Why You Might Need A Durham NC Custody Attorney To Negotiate Child Guardianship

By Gary Hall


No matter how mutual the decision is, divorcing is hard on everyone involved. That includes the children in the family. The best case is that you and your spouse can work things out and come to an agreement about custodial care for the kids. If there are issues that make you think joint guardianship may not be a good idea, you probably need the advice of a professional. A Durham NC custody attorney can discuss the advantages and disadvantages of various arrangements with you.

If you and your estranged spouse are cooperating with one another, and making your kids the number one priority, a joint custodial arrangement can usually be worked out. This is a plan for parents who are ready and willing to share the responsibilities of raising their children. Sometimes courts step when parents get to a sticking point in their negotiations.

Most of the time kids end up living with one parent during the week and spending weekends, or alternate weekends, and holidays with the other parent. This arrangement can have advantages for the adults. When one, or both, are involved with new partners or have moved away, this is a convenient arrangement. Alternating visitation on holidays is common and a good way for extended family to get to see the kids.

Bird nesting is becoming more common. This plan involves the parents moving in and out of the primary residence instead of the children. Most couples keep separate homes they use when it's not their turn to have the kids. A lot of parents decide to do this because it creates a more stable situation for the children, especially the youngest ones.

In the case of abuse or instability, one parent may have no option but to sue for sole custodial rights. A decision like this has to be approved by the court. To get approval, the partner suing has to prove to a judge that the spouse is physically abusive, abuses drugs or alcohol, or is financially, mentally or emotionally unstable. The accused has a chance to defend against the charges.

There are advantages to sole custodial care. The children stay in one home with the parent who is able and willing to be responsible for them. They are not directly subjected to the other parent's issues. Not having to interact with the other party, when the divorce was unpleasant, gives everyone time to gain some perspective. The custodial parent may have physical or legal custody, or both.

When parents can't agree about support, visitation, or anything else regarding their children, the court can step in and appoint a guardian ad litem. This is someone whose main function is to be an advocate for the children. They assess the situation and make their recommendations to the court regarding the custodial arrangement they believe to be in the best interest of the kids.

Divorce is difficult even when you know it's the only choice. Having children makes it even more traumatic. It's important for the parents to act like mature adults and put the interests of the kids above all.




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